I didn’t know where he was. I was at the beach and he could have been anywhere. I mean, if I narrowed it down I’m sure I could have figured out where he was. But I hadn’t narrowed it down.
I was relatively sure I wouldn’t run into him here, though.
It was a nice feeling, knowing that the beach was mine for the evening. I suppose there were little critters there, too, but I didn’t think about them because critters are kind of gross and creepy.
But, while I may not have known where he was, I could still think about him. I could still wonder if he was thinking about me. I could still doubt myself. I could still be connected to my world.
But then again, part of me wasn’t connected to the world. A part of me was here, on the beach. I was walking through the sand, feeling it grind on my feet. I was sort of lost to everything because I was allowing my misunderstanding of the world to permeate my mind and take me to a different place.
I wondered where he was. I couldn’t quite ever get away from it. I wasn’t even sure if I liked him. I could go back and forth but I thought of him a lot and it was actually kind of sad when I thought about it. Really quite sad, all of these thoughts and nothing to show for it. Nothing at all.
Then again maybe I could like him.
I walked into the water and let it cool my feet. It brought me back to reality. Back to a beach. Back to being alone.
But it was okay because I was a part of something and I wasn’t where I usually was. I was gone but I was still thinking of him.
I still didn’t know where he was.